Monday, May 14, 2007

Mother's Day

HS and Charlie gave me two of my favourite things for Mother's Day: sleep and a large Tim Hortons coffee. Ahhhhhh. That would be enough for me, but I also got flowers, homemade oatmeal pancakes and bacon, and a family nap in the afternoon. Sweet.

Alas, HS had to leave for Toronto last night, so Mother's Day ended a bit early in my opinion, but HS's work beckons. I hate being alone, especially since I'm alternating between freaking out and freakish calm. I'm in a huge downswing o' crazy, and I don't like it. I'm trying very hard to dig out of it, but even though I've upped the therapy and started the SJW again, I'm still a mess. And why? I feel like I've made a huge mistake. I should have spoken up and I didn't. And now I have to deal with the consequences. And who knows? Maybe I did make a mistake, maybe I didn't. I won't know for a while. I feel like I need to start a Gratitude Journal a la Oprah to remind myself that the life I have is actually pretty awesome, and this crazy is temporary and whoa baby, you have a lot of good things going for you, etc.

I'm stuck.

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